October 30, 2013


Earlier this week, I found out I have virtually no space left on my phone (which apparently has 8GB worth of memory space), so I started deleting. Pictures, videos, voice notes, phone numbers... and while going through the contacts on my phone, I saw names like


LOL. These contacts at some point or another, were names of actual people (mostly guys), but then our friendship or relationship turned sour and instead of deleting the phone numbers completely, their names were changed to stop me from calling or ever answering their calls. 99% of the time, seeing the contacts in this light definitely stopped me from prolonging unnecessary friendships.

Why didn't I just delete the phone numbers, you ask? Well, I used to do this thing where if I was "talking to" anyone, I'd memorize their number and it'd be easy to speak to them. That was until 2007 when I discovered that I couldn't UN-memorize someone's number and found myself calling them when I never should have. It was so bad that after a year of not speaking to said person, I still knew the number by heart. So because of that, I stopped memorizing numbers. This made it hard for me to recognize a number if I'd deleted it. Therefore, the next best option was to change their names to the aforementioned to dissuade me from continuing conversation :D

Luckily for me, after a while, I couldn't even remember who I stored as each of the names, so it was very easy to just ignore calls and stop myself from calling, because I didn't know who was who.


How do you deal when a friendship/relationship goes bust?

Loading web poll...

Follow on Bloglovin

October 29, 2013

Berry's Shouts Out

Hey friends,

If you've noticed my blog layout, I don't have a Blog Roll. I've seen them on other blogs and actually found nice blogs via Blog Rolls, but didn't want to add one here. So I'm just going to give a massive shout out to some of the blogs I read faithfully and enjoy. I think I'll break them down into categories


  • African Naturalistas - I'm biased cos I contribute on Fridays :p
  • The Kink and I - I like her layout. Some of the posts are too long and detailed for me though
  • My Fro & I - She inspired me to do my 31 Hairstyles in 31 Days challenge
  • Nappily Nigerian - Her name's Hadassah, which is soooo pretty! And her hair is looooooong!


  • Style Fash - One of the Power Puff Girls (Her, Bex and I)!
  • For Style Sake - Sisters who are really stylish
  • Third World Profashional - Everybody knows her, no introduction needed.
  • Dressed - She owns a boutique on the mainland (come to the island please). She has nice dresses.
  • Irony of Ashi - I like her style. She wears a lot of color.
  • Style By Queens - Cute girls with lovely style. One of them got engaged recently


  • Crafty Girl Living - She took a break for a while, but she's back and engaged and doing lots of wedding/pre-wedding crafts!
  • PS I Made This - It's amazing what you can make in a short amount of time with a few things at hand!





  • BexCoox - New blog. I'm waiting for her to invite me BEFORE she starts a post
  • Lohi's Creations - I wish she was my friend in real life and lived next door to me
  • Vegan Nigerian - All her recipes are plant-based, no joke. Even Nigerian food!
  • Cakesiena - Technically it's just posts of cakes that Cakes has made :)


  • I Do Weddings - Event planner, wedding dress designer, etc. And she has an Olivia Pope thing about her. 
  • Aisle Perfect - She's my cousin's friend and started her blog/website when she got engaged.
  • Everything Weddings And More (aka EWAM) - I think she started also when she got engaged...
*secret* I actually wanted to start started a wedding blog after Cakes proposed. But no time, so there are only like 3 posts! Which is sad, cos I wanted to blog about the whole engagement process, and continue afterwards with marriage tales, recipes, date ideas, etc. :(

And now, I've come to the end of my Shouts Out. These aren't all the blogs I read faithfully, but I'll have another Shout Out post when I feel led to, and will include others.

Have a pretty rest of the week!

Follow on Bloglovin

October 28, 2013

This Weekend I...

Hey everyone!

How are ya? How was your weekend? Did you do anything fun? Did you eat anything good? Speaking of eating, I believe there's a Love Language that wasn't captured by Gary Chapman - FOOD! I really believe that Food is one of my dominant Love Languages. Not that I love food a lot (although I do), but I think love can be shown through food, and no, I don't necessarily need to have cooked it. Let me tell you why I think it's a Love Language... whenever I'm with Cakes, at some point I ask him if he's eaten, and if he hasn't and it's late, I lecture him on proper eating. Why? Because I care. My asking if he's eaten is one of the ways by which I show him I love him. Granted, he probably thinks I just feel like nagging him, but that's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Anyways, here's a brief run through of what I did this weekend...

  1. I took my mum and aunt out to watch "Saro, the Musical." If you've been following my blog for a while, then you know that I enjoy performance art. So when I heard about this show, I was psyched and decided to take my mum and aunt out. I wish I had pictures (goes to search for pictures, didn't find any)... The show overall was pretty good. I feel like it's something, if done well, that can be taken to different stages around the world. The show had very good dancers, music, actors and they showed different Nigerian cultures soooooooo well! For a second there, I almost forgot Nigeria's million issues. As good as the show was, there were problems: TIMING (it started 45 mins late), SOUND (it killed me that waaaaaaay to many times, the sound was muffled or just off... fix your microphones), and LIGHTING (at one point, all the lights came on, and I wasn't sure what was going on. I would say to the producer/director - Good job, but it can be sooooo much better!
  2. I went for the TW Magazine Fitness Challenge Bootcamp 2! This is the second meetup since we first started. I think all the ladies have lost weight, body fat and inches. Oooooooooh, if you subscribe to TW Magazine, the current issue (with Tiwa Savage on the cover) has several pictures of me :p and the other ladies. I've lost a tiny amount of weight, but not anywhere near enough. God help me these remaining 5 weeks!
  3. I went to the beach (have you noticed how much I love water?) with Cakes and our family/friends. We had a marvelous time drinking coconut water, eating fresh coconuts and being drenched by the ocean. FUN TIMES!!!

  4. I had what I'm calling a mini but prolonged asthma attack. I say mini because I could function, but I knew I wasn't breathing well at all. Prolonged because I had to use my inhaler 3 times in 5 hours before I started breathing better. Suffice it to say, going to the Lagos Fashion and Design Week finale wasn't happening for me. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I MUST go next year, without fail!
  5. I connected with God! I'm ashamed to say it, but lately I've been flipflopping with my faith and spirituality. But yesterday, I made a much-needed effort into plugging into God's presence. I asked for forgiveness for a slew of things here and there. I poured my heart out. I just felt refreshed. It makes me wonder why I would ever choose sin and deal with guilt, over obeying God and feeling light.
  6. The devil tried to steal my joy! Well, PMS really. Cakes and I went on a wedding errand and by the end of the night, I was crying, blubbering, sniffing my eyes out. I'm pretty sure I'm just PMSing, but I think it includes wedding stress and apartment hunting. Y'all should help pray for us o. If not, I'll be looking for somebody's house to perch at after the wedding. 
That was my weekend in a nutshell. Next weekend, I foresee a lot of Rest & Relaxation!!! God knows I need it. 

Have a lovely week darl'ns!

Follow on Bloglovin

October 25, 2013

First Kiss Fridays FIRST!

Hello lovers!!!

Last week we had a looooooong awaited first kiss that was explosive and electrifying! We've got a SPECIAL SPECIAL treat next week!!! As in, I'm almost excited enough to post 2 First Kisses today, but nooooooooooooooooope. Good things come to those who wait.

Anyways, as usual, send stories of your first kisses ever, first kisses with boyfriends/girlfriends, ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, handsome/beautiful strangers, husbands/wives, etc... It will be TOTALLY ANONYMOUS!

Please send your stories to berrydakara@gmail.com

This happened almost ten years ago so some details are a little fuzzy. I was attending a NSBE career fair and did not realize that the 50+ copies of my resume I brought with me were tailored to only one company - my objective specifically said that I was interested in working as an intern for Company X! So I had to run over to a FedEx copy and print shop to make some more resumes. As a broke college student, money is already tight, so I was extra stressed out that I had to spend money I did not plan for, and be late to the career fair where I was hoping for a chance to land an internship.

Anyway, at the FedEx store, this really cute guy who was behind me at the payment counter caught up with me after I paid and was on my way back. It turns out that he was attending the same career fair. It could be that because he is from the South and they are generally more laid back but as we walked back to the career fair, his pace was slow and his voice was relaxing so it helped to calm my nerves down. He gave me his business card and asked me to call him; he got major points for not being pushy and trying to collect my number, even though I had no intention of calling him, lol.

The next day, I ran into him and he said "Hey pretty lady, I was expecting a call or text from you all through yesterday." I gave him some random excuse about losing his contact information and he promptly collected my number. I was heading to lunch so he asked if he could join me. I had to go to my hotel room to freshen up or pick up something, I can't remember anymore. Anyway as soon as we got into the room, I kicked off my heels and sat on the bed; he sat next to me. We talked for a little while and he kept on saying things to make me laugh. If you know me, when I laugh, I do so with my whole body, shining my entire 32 and everything. I can't remember the exact details anymore, but I do remember reaching down to put my shoes on and when I straightened up he kissed me. It wasn't my first ever kiss but it was the most memorable first kiss I've shared with any guy to date..

*Our first First Kiss with a Handsome Stranger! My, he sounds like the quintessential Southern (US) gentleman. This reminds me of Gone With The Wind - just the whole Southern thing. I miss Atlanta...*

Thanks Dear Reader for this story. To everyone else, show some love to those around you today :)

Hugs, kisses, winks, a handshake and pat on the back, from moi to you!

Follow on Bloglovin

October 21, 2013

Weekend Snaps

Hey hey! I hope you had a pretty weekend. Mine was alright. I ate, worked out, ate some more (I made a plantain and potato hash and loved it waaaaay too much. I think Cakes liked it too).

I spent a good part of Saturday with Cakes, watching him at work. I'll just share a few pics...

Cakes made this, YES HE DID! How'd you like the dove?

He's working, I'm snapping!

I found this picture on my phone. This was the day I first thought that Cakes and I could definitely be in a relationship.

October 18, 2013

Facebook Page, Yes or No?

I've been toying with the idea of a Facebook page for my blog. I see other bloggers that have pages, but they have like a gazillion followers, whereas I don't. Plus I feel like that would be crossing over into TOO MUCH! There's the blog, there's Twitter, there's Instagram, and now Facebook? I think it might increase visibility for the blog, but I just don't know if I need one. What do you think?

Loading web poll...

Follow on Bloglovin

First Kiss Fridays is baaaaaaaaaack!!!

Hello lovers!!!

Sorry for the break in transmission. I mistakenly thought we didn't have any stories to share last week, when I hadn't even checked my Spam folder. I checked, and sure enough, we've got stories to shaaaaare! Thank you to the contributors! You are BEAUTIFUL, in every single waaaaaaaaaaay, words can't bring... Oops, sorry. I thought I was Berry Aguilera for a second.

Anyways, as usual, send stories of your first kisses ever, first kisses with boyfriends/girlfriends, ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, handsome/beautiful strangers, husbands/wives, etc... It will be TOTALLY ANONYMOUS!

Please send your stories to berrydakara@gmail.com

Hi Berry! I still remember my very first kiss, but this isn't about that. This is about my most memorable first kiss. Let's call him X.

I met X just after my final exams in university. I hadn't connected with anyone like that in a while but it was such a frustrating thing at the time because we had been in the same school for all of my years there, but had never even spoken to each other. I always acknowledged his gorgeousness but I didn't know I was really into him until we were properly introduced.

So, we started being friends- talking & texting, but I held back because I was already leaving and there was no point starting anything. Then several weeks later, I had to come back to the city for something, and we hung out a few times. The tension just kept piling up. Until one night, at a pub with X and a few friends, maybe it was the alcohol (I wasn't drunk though), but everything just started making sense in only one direction- DO IT! This was also the year Y.O.L.O was a thing. So maybe I owe Drake a 'Thank You.'

After a few very potent cocktails, I think it had become fairly obvious what we had to do- so without a word, we left the pub for his car in the dark parking lot. I remember leaning on him in silence for like a moment, maybe there was some talking... I can't remember when we made the transition but all of a sudden, it wasn't one kiss, more like a hundred. It felt like one big, hot, steamy explosive everywhere moment- long enough for our friends to come looking for us.The chemistry was amazing and I was glad all the tension and anticipation weren't wasted.

Anyhooo. Life had to happen and we are presently living life in our different locations, but we still keep in touch.

*Oooooh, LAWDY! Somebody gimme a fan. It just got HAWT up in HERE! Ice cold water please! No, a milkshake! No ice cream! Actually, just put me in a bucket of ice! :p

I felt like I was watching a movie, just reading and playing that in my head. You know how you've liked someone for sooooo long, and nothing happens, and then one day it all comes together and BOOM! *whew*

Thanks for this story. I really enjoyed reading it and hope others will too! To everyone else, if you're in a relationship or married, grab your honey today and give him/her a BIG BIG, passionate, toe-curling kiss! Have a wonderful weekend :)

Follow on Bloglovin

October 17, 2013


Yo yo!

Can I just say that I needed this 2-day holiday that just passed?! It was soooooo necessary for life! I have to say though, that seeing ram heads all over the place kinda freaked me out. I was driving in my neighborhood and at one house, they had just cut off the ram's head and you could see the blood and everything. BLECH! I'v never celebrated Sallah. I've never had muslim friends, so I don't get the whole "Sallah meat" frenzy. I'm not saying it to be snarky or snooty. I'd say the same thing about Chinese New Year or Hanukkah. I actually asked my friend if Sallah celebration is like Christmas. Anyway, I know you're wondering what my confession is, so let me stop rambling.

The following conversation occurred at church one day...

Usher: Hey Berry.
Me: Oh hey, how are you?
Usher: You know people say you're a snob, right?
Me: ENH? *confused and totally surprised*
Usher: Yeah, I've heard on more than one occasion that you're a snob and you don't talk to people.
Me: *frantically scanning my memory to find out if I'd been rude to anyone or blanked someone*
Usher: I just thought you should know
Me: Well, okay. #1. You don't just say stuff like that out of the blue. #2. Who are these people? #3. If you must know, and you can feel free to share the information with said people, I'm innately a VERY SHY person. If you came to my secondary school to look for me, the way I was described was "the dark, skinny, quiet girl." So please, the next time someone feels the need to tell you that I'm a snob, tell them that I'm shy, quiet and reserved when I don't know someone well enough.

I won't even lie, his comment made me feel very hurt. I felt like people were judging me without knowing who I am. I complained to Cakes, and he said one or two people had said the same thing to him. That they've tried to reach out and be my friend, but that I have a wall up and don't let people in (true to some extent).

Here's the thing. I'm generally friendly. I will smile and laugh with almost anyone. At the same time, I can be very very shy. It takes a lot of effort for me to go and start a conversation with a stranger. Chances are that I would think about it in my head for 30+ minutes before saying hello. In addition, I feel like at my age, most females already have their established friendships and it's harder to break into a circle of friends. It's one thing if you already have something in common and have been acquaintances for a while. It's another thing to automatically become friends with someone, if you haven't had a substantial conversation to find out if you have anything in common. (I want to break off and talk about female vs male friends but that's a loooooooong topic, so I'll address it another time)

In summary, yes, I confess to having a wall up. BUT it doesn't take too much to push through the wall. You don't even need to push, actually. You can huff, puff, and blow the wall down with a simple 5-minute conversation. I, obviously though, have to do more to NOT have a seemingly snobby attitude.

Conclusion: If you're in the same church as I am, and you feel that I snubbed you at any point in time, SAWRRRYYYYYYYYYY O! I didn't mean to. Chances are that I was hungry and you didn't have a snack to feed me :p


Follow on Bloglovin

October 16, 2013

Holiday Snaps

Hello ladies and gentlemen,

*this post draft has been lingering for over a month, and for that, I apologize.*

So last month I told y'all about how I wept over the apparent "loss" of my engagement ring. Again, Thank Youuuuu for sympathizing with me (smiles) and Booooooo for laughing at me (sticks tongue out, while frowning). Anyways, just thought to share the highlights of my much needed vacay with all y'all. I know I've said "y'all" twice already, but being home in Atlanta does that to me. Okay, moving on...

I got to Atlanta bright and early... too early, as the airport wasn't even open yet, and we had to wait for 30 mins before we could disembark. We eventually did, and it was off to hug my parents, sister/her hubby and the most adorable nephew in the whole entire universe!!! My family's camera-shy so no pics of them on here.

HIGHLIGHT 1 - Wedding Dress Shopping!!!!!!!!!!! The 'rents, sister and I found my dress at the first store we visited. But just to be sure, and because we had another appointment, we checked out another store. They also had a really nice dress, but at the end of the day, I could have only one and I selected the one everyone liked the most. Nope, I'm not sharing details or pictures. My friend's convinced I got a pink or black dress, because she thinks I'm very random! But then again, I could shock her and wear a white dress. All will be revealed AFTER the wedding :D

October 14, 2013

What I did this weekend... Wedding, Bloggirls Day Out, and Natural Hurrs!


I'm willing myself to have energy this morning, but truthfully I'd rather be in bed, sleeping this migraine away. But I'm here at work, willing 4pm to come quickly so I can get my holiday started!

How was your weekend? What'd you do? Who'd you see? What'd you eat? What'd you wear? What'd your drink?

My weekend was FOINE n DANDY! Let me give you a quick breakdown, innit?!

FROIDAY(I spelled it Froiday on purpose, because that's my fake Bri-ish accent, innit?!)
I didn't do much on Froiday. Why? Because erm, I was tired. I think. I can't remember Friday. Moving on.

October 11, 2013

First Kiss Fridaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaays!!!

This post is empty. WHY? Because nobody sent me kissing stories.

Send stories of your first kisses ever, first kisses with boyfriends/girlfriends, ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, handsome/beautiful strangers, husbands/wives, etc... It will be TOTALLY ANONYMOUS!

Please send your stories to berrydakara@gmail.com


Follow on Bloglovin

What I'm Doing This Weekend - Natural Hair Event!!!


There's a fantastic Natural Hair workshop happening tomorrow and I'm trés excited. Renowned natural hair stylist, Felicia Leatherwood is in LAGOS, NIGERIA!!! She's worked with Viola Davis, Jill Scott and many others! I'm going to be there, and if you can make it, say hi to me :) It's hosted by The Kinky Apothecary and tickets are available in advance on Afritickets or at L'Espace in Victoria Island. Tickets are N3500 or N4500 (comes with goodies).

If you're not familiar with Felicia Leatherwood, here's some of her work.

Teyonah Parris - Source
Jill Scott - Source

Jill Scott (love this style) - Source
Nicole Ari Parker - Source

See ya tomorrow!

Follow on Bloglovin

What I'm watching now - PRANKS!

I don't know about you, but I love watching prank videos. They make me laugh and cry at the same time.

Since it's Friday and weekend is upon us, why not start off with a good dose of laughter?

1. COFFEE SHOP SURPRISE - Saw it first on ThirdWorld Profashional's blog

2. DRIVE THRU PRANK - OMG, they should totally do this at the new KFC drive thrus in Lagos!!!


Okay, that's enough laughter for me and you.

2 more things...

2. Follow me with Bloglovin, on Twitter, and on Instagram!

Follow on Bloglovin

October 10, 2013

On Baby Names...

Since marriage and impending children are in my near and not-so-near future, respectively, I've been thinking more and more about baby names. Before you start wondering in that pretty head of yours, NO, I'm NOT pregnant. It's physically impossible for me to be pregnant at this particular point in time, especially seeing as I have not been visited by an angel telling me that I am to bear Nigeria's savior.

Anyhoo, I'm not trying to be preggers anytime soon, much to the chargin of great-grandparents, grandparents, aunties and uncles in-waiting. I still have this belief that once you start having children, your life is over. Well, not over over. But EVERYTHING you do would have to include your child(ren). I haven't gone to Greece, Bora Bora, Australia, my native New Zealand, etc and I'm not about to haul any babies around with me. My mum has graciously agreed to babysit though, so maybe little Berries and Cakes will come this time next year. I digress.

So BABY NAMES. Here's my thinking about baby names...

October 9, 2013

Random Post Alert! Knaughty Knickers!


It's been a while since I posted a random topic. I usually get them from my head, or discussions I have with people (such as the proper way to construct a Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich... for the record, you put PB on one slice, and J on the other slice). Anyways, the other day, I was talking with someone about the different kinds of panties for women.

It started off when I was asked whether I wear G-strings (I'm a very easy person to talk to, so people feel the need to ask me TMI questions like this one). Well, I had my phase of V-strings (Victoria's Secret G-strings) in the early 2000's, right after my phase with Thongs (no thanks to Sisqo and his 'Tho-tho-tho-tho-THONG' song). I was actually almost obsessed with Victoria's Secret back in the day. If anyone wanted to buy me a present, I asked for a VS Gift Card.

Anyways, that phase passed. In retrospect, I used to think thongs and g-strings were the ultimate sexy underwear. But now, NO WAY JOSE! Maybe if you have buns of steel, no lumps, no jiggly-jiggly, then sure. Otherwise, give me a TANGA or LACE BOYSHORTS/HIPSTERS! Oh, you don't know what those are? Well, Wikipedia to the rescue!


I'm sure most guys would wholeheartedly agree that the less coverage, the better. To them, I say, YOU WEAR THEM since you like them so much.

I wonder if there are any types left out from the list... What's your favorite style?

What's your favorite style of knickers/panties?
pollcode.com free polls 
Follow on Bloglovin

October 4, 2013

First Kiss Fridays is heeeeere!

Hello lovers!!!

Yup yup, the weekend's here and we're ready to have bunches of fun or rest, but first of all... KISSESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! As usual, thanks to everyone who's sent in a story so far.

I NEED MORE STORIES!!!!!!!!!! Send stories of your first kisses ever, first kisses with boyfriends/girlfriends, ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, handsome/beautiful strangers, husbands/wives, etc... It will be TOTALLY ANONYMOUS!

Please send your stories to berrydakara@gmail.com

Hi Berry! I've been wanting to write this forever, but NO THANKS to sickness and every other negative factor :p It is well with me :)

My first kiss was with a guy named Samson. He had long, flowing hair, and was as strong as a bear, lion and ox put together. He even killed a lion with his bare hands! No wait, that's a different Samson. I ain't no Delilah! Anyway, I met MY Samson right after I finished secondary school. I had just broken up with my first boyfriend, whom I never kissed and I met Samson shortly after in the estate where I grew up - UP DOLPHIN ESTATE!!!  

My first kiss with Samson was very awkward. There was a lot of saliva involved (yuck), and it just felt weird and senseless to me. I'll give you a little shocker here. He was 14 years older than me. I was 18, and he was 32. Don't judge me, but he was my first love, in retrospect. We dated for a little while, but broke up when we both realized that it wasn't going to lead anywhere. The age difference was a mighty hindrance. Now that I think about it though, Samson was very intelligent, mature, God-fearing and is actually the exact type of man I'd want to be with now. I'm 23 now, very single and NOT ready to mingle (lol)... I still thank God for my life though. It's filled with stories and this is one of them.

*Hmmm. If he's exactly the type of guy she'd want, my question would be "Is he still available?" Cos if he is, then why can't they get back together? At this point, he'd be 37 though, so chances are he's married. Aww, such is life.

BTW, have you nominated me for a Nigerian Blog Award or 3 yet? Pretty please nominate moi for Best NEW, HUMOR, PERSONAL blog :) Tenks a bunsh, and have a BERRY PRETTY weekend!

Follow on Bloglovin

October 2, 2013

So Nigeria celebrated her 53rd Indy Anniversary...

And what did I do? Wear green? No. Wish anyone a Happy Independence? No. Silently pray that PHCN kept the power on all day? YES. Did they? NO!

Lemme tell you what I did do...

  1. I slept in. For me, it was simply a random day off! A random day off, for me to get some much needed rest. So, I slept and enjoyed waking up 3/4 hours later than usual :)
    Berry and her Big A$$ Fro

    We didn't dress alike on purpose. Just FYI
  2. I went jet-skiing! FINALLY!!! Remember how that was one of the fun things I wanted to do to spice up my life? The place I originally wanted to go to, was shut down a couple of months ago - which caused me great strife and sadness. I had told Cakes I wanted to go since January, and he said I should wait. I waited, waited some more, and waaaaaaaaaaaaaited my plans away. Fortunately for him, on my way back from the airport on my last trip out, I spied some jetskis while crossing the Lekki-Ikoyi bridge. We stopped by and they said that they do indeed rent out jetskis, so we made plans for Indy Day.

    It was FUN, while we were on them. The 2 hours spent waiting for the guy who had the keys...NOT FUN. Cakes and the guide falling over into the water... NOT FUN. His BB basically drowning... DEFINITELY NOT FUN.