February 1, 2021

Valentine's Day for Single Moms

Happy February ladies and gentlemen! It appears that the month of love is upon us. In just 13 short days, we shall be bombarded with photos and videos of flowers, rings, chocolates, cars and the like all over social media. Even though I no longer have a romantic partner, I still look forward to Valentine's Day. I'm not even sure why though - maybe just the pseudo-holiday factor? Anyway, I was chatting with a certain family member last week that said single people need to leave Valentine's Day alone, as it's supposed to be for people in relationships (and children because kids are allowed to celebrate everything apparently). I disagreed and I told her I think anyone who wants to celebrate Valentine's Day should do so, inhcluding single mothers like me. As a matter of fact, I've decided to share 7 ideas for single moms who want to celebrate Valentine's Day. 

I've chosen to focus on you as the mom, and not involve the kids - there are more than enough articles and blog posts out there that give you ideas on what to do with the kids. This one is focused on you alone. Of course you may have to have someone watch the child[dren] or wait for them to go to bed before you can indulge but here goes...

  1. A Getaway - Now I know this might be hard due to logistics of who will watch the child[ren], especially if the father is not involved at all. However, if you have friends, family, or a trusted babysitter, I fully endorse a mini staycation. Book a hotel room for 1 to 2 nights and get some much needed time to yourself! I did this over the weekend and I feel so light and airy! Do you know what it's like to go almost 24 hours without noise?

  2. Nice Lingerie - I am a firm believer that sexy lingerie is not necessarily for the pleasure of the opposite sex. Of course they like to see it - and take it off too - but there's a certain confidence and oomph when you wear nice/sexy lingerie. This is not about another person, but fully for yourself. I mentioned on the Mommy Oyoyo podcast (Episode 46: Sex and the African Mother feat. Olori Coitus) that I decided to overhaul my lingerie drawer to help me get my sexy back. Make sure to get measured so that you're wearing the right size. I happened to go to Victorias Secret last week and the associate who helped with my measurement stopped counting after DDD and said, "Girl, you are blessed and highly favored!" I'm now on the hunt for my correct size in styles that I like - black and lacy.

  3. A Toy - To be honest, toys are not my thing. I don't particularly care for them by myself, so this is really for those who like them. I wish I could point you in a particular direction, but... wait, my friend recommended one that looked interesting to me (see here). Hold on, I've just seen another one with more than one thousand  5-star reviews. Erm, I'm coming back. Wait for me. 

  4. Jewelry - Jewelry is one of the more popular gifts during Valentine's Day celebrations, from necklaces with inscriptions declaring a forever love to diamond rings for that special finger. Well, if you were previously engaged or married, said ring on special finger is no more, right? Why not replace it with something you like for you? I never wanted a diamond ring for my proposal even though I admired them on other people. But I'm turning 40 next year and I'm beginning to think that I do want a diamond ring in my future - bought by me though. The point is, feel free to treat yourself to nice jewelry - rings, earrings, necklaces, bracelets, whatever floats your boat. 

  5. Outsourced Chores - This may not sound romantic, but then again, this isn't a list about romance. It's a list of things you might want as a single mom, and I know for sure having one or more chores outsourced for the day will go down well! Lots of restaurants near you might have Valentine specials - order something for you (and maybe the kids). Hire a cleaning person to come give your space a deep clean. I have half a mind to buy a robot vacuum for this purpose actually.

  6. Self Care/[DIY] Spa Day - If you're not comfortable going to a spa just yet (or maybe your city/country's on lockdown), treat yourself with a DIY spa session. You can make or buy a nice body scrub, give yourself a facial, soak in a sea salt or bubble bath, paint your nails, do up your hair, wear makeup - the possibilities are endless! There's nothing like a good pampering session to make you feel nice and supple.

  7. Galentine! - Well, this year it would most probably have to be on Zoom because of you-know-what. There are lots of fun online games and activities that you can do with your friends. One good activity I've seen is a virtual sip and paint party where you and your friends preorder the materials, then jump on a Zoom call and follow live or prerecorded instructions.

Happy Valentine's Day in advance everyone!

Bodacious Berry.

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