Having Faith and a Plan B

I am not the best Christian out there - VERY FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR from it. I wish I was a much stronger Christian who made sure to read her bible daily, pray daily, set aside scheduled time to commune with God, discern God's voice and instructions easily, quote 50 Bible verses without blinking, etc. I'm sure most of you understand what I'm saying. I've struggled as a Christian almost from my teenage years - back then, I think I was piggybacking on my friends' relationships with God, instead of developing my own. Fast forward to now - sometimes, I get so knocked down that all I can see is darkness, and the only prayer I can muster is a weak, "Help." At other times, I'm telling anyone who has ears that my name means God answers prayers, and that He does.

When I first met my husband, one of the things that drew me to him was his level of faith. I've always been the more practical and realistic one. For example, he could say something like, "We're going to buy our house next year." And I'll probably roll my eyes inwardly and think "This man has come again - let's pay this or that off." Or like when I got the hospital bill from my first admission last year, I was almost rolling on the floor in tears, because I was wondering how we'd pay it off when we had other financial obligations. He on the other hand, wasn't worried. It's taken me a while to trust and believe that no matter what happens, God will provide. That's something that used to bug and worry me before, but not anymore.

However, there are other things that I've prayed for and then wondered if God will really answer my prayers. And in the event that he doesn't answer quickly enough, I try to help him along. Additionally, several people who are stronger Christians than I am, have joined me in prayer sometimes but have puzzled me when they say I should prepare a Plan B for if God doesn't answer my prayer. And I've asked quietly - "Why tell me to have faith about this issue, and then also say I should prepare for if God doesn't answer my prayer?" Like, isn't that the opposite of having faith?

I watched the following video from Joyce Meyer the other day, and it kinda rocked me to think that having faith doesn't necessarily mean God will give you what you want... or that if He does, it may not be the way you want it answered.

I don't know. I'm trying now to pray that no matter what happens in my life, that I'll trust God. Maybe that's what faith is - trusting God no matter what. Le sigh. What do you guys think?

BTW our baby girl is 9 months old today!!!!!! Gawsh, how time flies! Oh, and her first tooth is out :D