February 17, 2014

Exes at weddings... Yay or Nay?

So I went to a wedding once, and we were all having fun - the couple looked great, the music was good, the food was better... and then at one point, I turned around in my seat, and who did I see? The bride's ex-boyfriend! Not only was he her ex-boyfriend, he was her JERK of an ex-boyfriend too. And I couldn't help but wonder why in the heck he was there. From what I know, it wasn't a good breakup, so she couldn't have invited him. I did see the groom hanging around their table, so maybe they know each other? But would he have felt comfy enough to invite his bride's ex? I dunno. I just thought it was weird.

Cakes and I agreed to not have exes at our wedding. Well, I agreed reluctantly, because I don't have hard feelings towards a couple of my exes. Cakes doesn't either, but he's from the school of thought that doesn't think you can be friends with your ex (I think you can, and I AM). I think that there are a few criteria that must be met before you should put your ex on your wedding guest list...

  1. It was NOT a bad break-up. Nobody cheated on anybody, nobody was abusive or neglectful or disrespectful or hated anyone's friends and/or family. It should have been a clean break-up. Like maybe distance, or you just weren't compatible...
  2. You are SIMPLY friends, and there is absolutely no wishing or hoping or thinking or praying that you'll get back together.
  3. Your betrothed is OKAY with your ex attending the wedding. And if your ex is dating someone new (or has gotten married/engaged), then their new person has to be okay with it too.

DO NOT invite THIS ex

What do you think? Exes at weddings are a GO or a NO?

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  1. Hmm, tricky one for me. Abeg let everybody stay where they are. There's this funny saying "Old fire wood catches fast"...lol.

    That said, except everyone is very mature about it and there are no more hurt or love feelings, then perhaps it can fly. But personally, its a NO NO for me.

    P.s You better bribe me berry before i expose your hidden talent to the world...hehehe. *Evil Laughter*


  2. Some people invite their exes to their wedding just to show off that they are better off without them, sad but true. I think there is no need to invite your exes to wedding, they would not add or subtract anything to the event so why bother. Even if you now friends with them, it might still be awkward. The past should be left in the past! #2cents


  3. I agree with ur criteria.I av only 1 ex and we av a frenemy kinda relationship. It was a real nasty break up but we learnt to be civil towards each other cos we share the same circle of friends. Ion tink the boo would have a problem wit it, but I doubt if I'd send him an invite for my wedding. Can't stand d dude for more than 10 mins, not to talk of having him at my wedding. No bad belle but make efriborri hol deir own camp abeg 3-|

    1. Erm, you seem more like enemies than frenemies.

  4. It depends. Some people are very good friends with their exes, so in that case, its just normal for the ex to attend.

  5. I am of your school of thought biko. The breakup has to be Lysol clean please. I don't like awkward moments plus my day is supposed to be fun day and not a Remembrance Day mbok

  6. Yeah!!! Me too abeg,it would be a very awkward situation for me to invite my EX or Exes to my wedding oh,whether I'm friends with them or not....

  7. Heck to no. Anyone who has seen me naked ain't coming to my wedding. What is he meant to be imagining while am on the high table?our sex history?

  8. For me, I have no issues with it so long as the break up was clean and we've moved on. I've attended exes weddings and the last one had me flying down to Ph and then to calabar to attend. I loved the look on the faces of my friends who thought i was crazy as well as his brother's wife who was clearly shocked. But then again, he called me up personally to invite me... so why not? Lol

  9. LOL@sex history! Totally cracked me up. I can only imagine the shock on my face when I glance from my position on the high table only to see my ex smacking & licking his lips @ me with gusto!!! Lol. Exes....a total NO-No

  10. I can't beliv am jst seeing dis, cos am definitely gonna invite my ex 2 my wedding, he did d same tin 2 me, cos I was so young nd naïve, gave him 6yrs of my life nd he practically invited my whole family 2 his wedding, well except my mum who doesn't live in Nigeria, 2 tink d marriage didn't last a year, nw no 1 shld gt me wrng o, am way beta witout him, am walkn down d aisle in november nd am definitely sendn his entire family iv, I dnt care wot any1 says

  11. Oh I 4got 2 add d fact dt, we didn't fight or anytin, I saw him on friday nite nd we go d iv's on sat mrng, so am gonna send his entire family iv


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